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Hi Papabear, Greetings from Brazil! :D

My question is if it's worth to try a homosexual relationship and risk to lose my family love or at least not going to be like before, just for knowing me better?

(I going to tell you just a little something about me, just to you understand me, I hope you don't worry :x)

From the beginning, I am very thoughtful before take any decision, and I see all things that involves to nothing go wrong, harm others and not make mistakes (I know no one can live a life without do mistakes, but I try to avoid them as much as I can), and I am a perfectionist, I never had much friends, just a few and real good friends, most of the part I am antisocial, shy, I was always was trying to be funny at all time just to see one smile and make me happy :D, and never had much experiences in my life and I am beginning to be more open to them (Think less and do more I suppose). I've never been attracted to a woman or to man. I never kiss or a girl or boy. I'm starting to think I'm going crazy thinking so much about my sexuality and what I want in my life.

I grew up with my parents always fighting, my father always beat my mother real bad, and arrived at a point my mother gathered the courage to ask for a divorce (I was 13), finally she'll never have to suffer at his hands again (I live with her and my two sisters), he has to pay child support to me and my sisters but he paid only one year, he was forced to pay up until we reach 18 years, but he fled to avoid paying more and I never had contact with him again, so I begin my adolescence (14 years) without a father, now literally(when I lived with him was as if I was not his son, so much so that he said to my mom that he wanted a DNA Test), within my 14 years until my 18 I have spent more attracted to men than women, I wonder sometimes for lack of a presence of a father and I live with just my mom and my sisters, I may have been more influenced in some way by them having a more feminine, like this was going to me with the years, I always see them with boyfriends, hugging, kissing, leaving home to have fun at parties, I do not know. What I believe is that all this can be only psychological and spend, can not be? 

I think my parents is going to accept that, but not very well because no one in my family is homosexual neither bisexual, I will be a disappointment to my family as they themselves have said(in a moment of jest, but seriously saying), I love my grandparents, uncles, cousins from part of mother, from part of my father I lost contact with them also, I fear they going to make the talk harsh every time, look at me with a face disappointment and sadness(90% sure) and at worst lose touch with them too, without telling my friends that possibly lose it.

I don't even want to imagine lose all of this just for confirm what I feel and try it. It's too much. If I try and like and lose my family love, not try and continues normally or try and lose my family love and see that this is not what I want and lose all?!

Signed,

Sieg

P.S: Sorry if I wrote wrong, I hope you can understand what I wrote, you are the best! XD

* * *

Dear Sieg,

I believe you are the first Brazilian to write Papabear. Thanks for your letter :-3 Your English is a lot better than my Portuguese, and I believe I understand what you are asking me, so no worries there.

I believe what you are experiencing has more to do with the lack of a strong father figure in your life than with your necessarily being gay. You might or might not be gay, but what is more likely is that you are simply sexually confused because you don’t have a strong role model in your life.

(Before I continue, a note to readers: I am not saying here that children raised by two fathers or two mothers cannot be socially well adjusted—heck, there are some women out there who make better male role models than men; what I will be talking about is statistical evidence of the negative impact on boys—especially heterosexual boys—without strong father figures in their lives.)

Studies have shown that boys who grow up without fathers (or with bad father figures) in their lives are more prone to drug use, do less well in school, are more likely to get into trouble with the law, have a harder time feeling like they belong anywhere, and are more confused about their sexuality, sometimes acting out in inappropriate, even harmful ways.

Therefore, before you worry about deciding where you stand on your sexuality, what you desperately need is a strong male role model in your life. I would suggest that you find someone like that with whom you can spend good quality time; someone who can help you learn to be a man, which is something your mother and sisters are not going to be able to do. This can be an uncle, or a grandfather, or perhaps a teacher, a coach, or an employer. You need a strong, older man in your life because your wife-beating, son-denying, hateful father was not a real man.

Once you find someone like that, spend as much time as you can with him, whether it is working a job, or learning something, or doing something recreational. You need this in your life.

Concentrate on this relationship, and don’t worry so much, for now, about your sexuality. You clearly don’t really know what your sexuality is at this point, so don’t try to “come out” to your family about being gay when you might not actually be gay.

I hope you can find someone like this in your life. Write again soon and let me know how you’re doing.

Papabear

submitted by ScorpiosAlpha
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I'll be there. :P I live in Memphis, TN, so if anybody in the area needs a ride to con, let me know! .^

submitted by LuckyStarBunny
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i've been making it my goal to make friends and socialize in second life, but i keep running out of things to do and places to explore. i'd like some furry buddies to play with. my name there is the same as here, macrouge.

submitted by macrouge
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Gizmodo: "Forbes Used the Logo for a Furry Convention in an Obamacare Article"



Evidently editorial deadlines are a little tight at Forbes as they grabbed an image off Wikipedia without really checking what it was. In this case a registered service mark of one of the largest furry conventions.

The Forbes article no longer carries the image, just a note that the mistaken image has been removed.

Still... Possibly the first time a furry con has appeared in Forbes? :)

 Some things that happen . They happen.




Artist of the Week
http://www.furaffinity.net/user/yukaidragon/

Google Says We're Creepy
http://www.flayrah.com/5242/are-we-scaring-away-potential-furry-fans-google-says-yes

Government Admits Area 51
http://gma.yahoo.com/area-51-revealed-cia-spy-plane-documents-115407496--abc-news-topstories.html

 Things that broke: Shoutcast plug in (the audio stream) wasn't connecting.

Crash count: 1 (right in the middle of the credits)

submitted by Zoruart
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I really wanted to draw from when I was about 5 years old. Years later, I've only made a few attempts at drawing but it didn't do much for me. Now as a teen, I'm dying to learn how to draw anthropomorphic arts with my creative brain that's dying to get artsy. Can anyone please help me out? I really REALLY want to learn how to draw furs and anthropomorphic art and I'm dying to learn! I would really love tips/advice on how to draw and I'm seeking tutorials that can help me start my dream. If anyone can help, please do. <:3 I thank you very much.

submitted by SkunkyRageNCuteness
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submitted by ronoverdrive
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Lee and Paul are two buddies at a mid-sized university. When the school receives a large collection of ancient artifacts, mysterious and dangerous events begin to happen — events which lead our heroes into entirely new lives and forms as mystical protectors! That’s the premise of Loop & Hoodie, a weekly web comic written by Adron Buske and illustrated by Dan Cassity and Travis Nuckolls. Why mention it here? Well it turns out that Lee — in his form known as “Loop” — transforms into a large anthropomorphic foo-dog. He just looks like a big werewolf — hence his name! Check it out at www.loopandhoodie.com.

image c. 2013 Cassity and Nuckolls

submitted by Nerdy_Furfag
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FUZZY NOTES OVERALL EPISODE 36 Holy crap! 'Crown the Shark, last weeks full episode of Fuzzy Notes, is the most popular ever with over 1,000 downloads from Tuesday to Thursday alone! Thanks for the listens, everyone!!! B-Sides is, of course, the smaller, more bite-sized version of Fuzzy Notes...much like the B-Side to a single, only in this case the singles were last week's featured artists, and the B-Sides are a second listen to three of those amazing furry musicians! This week we hear another track from the Brazilian Royalty (tm) Berserker Shark, a beautiful track from West Coaster Timber, and Awesome Okie Psychix!! THE MUSIC: Berserker Shark - Dance At Zero Track: https://www.furaffinity.net/view/11311360/ FA: http://www.furaffinity.net/user/berserker-shark/ Timber - A Lonesome Winter Track: https://www.furaffinity.net/view/11313477/ FA: http://www.furaffinity.net/user/timber Twitter: http://twitter.com/timberthapuppy Psychix - Minty Fresh Track: https://www.furaffinity.net/view/10702163/ FA: http://www.furaffinity.net/user/psychix Soundcloud: https://soundcloud.com/psychix HOUSEKEEPING: Please give Fuzzy Notes a review on iTunes or Podomatic...it helps us get furry musicians to more ears, perky and droopy...ALL! iTunes: https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/id581600769 Podomatic: http://fuzzynotes.podomatic.com Like me on Facebook! I'll like you back...a lot! Follow me on Twitter...I'll follow you too...a lot! But not in the stalkery way. Twitter: http://twitter.com/Potoroo Facebook: http://www.facebook.com/FuzzyNotes Fuzzy Notes Dropbox: http://soundcloud.com/fuzzy-notes/dropbox Closing Track - Fuzzy Notes 4 by Asid Rayne B-Sides: Episode 17 - FUZZY NOTES OVERALL EPISODE 36 Holy crap! 'Crown the Shark, last weeks full episode of Fuzzy N...

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submitted by Cacoman04
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Hi Papabear,

My question is: How old is too old?

I'm a 30 year old Australian male who has been sitting on the sidelines of furry subculture. Only recently have I decided to become more active in the community (via chats/IM/etc.) and with an ultimate goal to attend the U.S. conventions with a fully realized fursona/fursuit.

My question relates to my concerns with my age. From what I have noticed, furries tend to be younger (average 10 years) and I feel apprehensive with socializing and interaction as my thought processes tend to revolve around "aren't you too old for this?" or "will I have difficulty with furries more closer to my age who have been fursuiting for many years (group exclusion)?"

I know the community highly inclusive, however, I worry that there may be underlying sentiments among the community that I'm not aware of. 

Will my age be a non-issue, or is there any merit to my concerns as I do worry about my age being a point of contention; especially since attending US conventions as international furry is a big enough hurdle.

Apologies for the long winded letter.

Warmest Thanks

Antares NaE

* * *

Dear Antares NaE,

Your letter is by no means long-winded, so no worries. And, if your age of 30 were an issue, I would be in real trouble at 47 (48 soon). When you say that furries tend to be younger, and then parenthetically add “(average 10 years)” I’ll assume you mean they average about 10 years younger than you and not 10 years old :-3.

Yes, the majority of furries are in their teens and twenties. That’s because people of that age group are still often in touch with their childlike, creative sides, which has a lot to do with being furry and its appeal. We love animated films and TV shows, fantasy and sci-fi books, comic books and graphic novels, video and online games, and the like. These things are typically associated with younger audiences. And many of the furries you see around now who are young will leave the fandom when they reach their 30s or 40s, deciding that furry is too immature for them.

Then there are the hardcore furries. These are the people who are furry to the bone, and they will remain furry until the day they die because being a furry isn’t just something they do, it is something they ARE. Older furries are special because they manage to survive the adult world while still keeping touch with their inner child. It’s sort of a Peter Pan Syndrome thing perhaps LOL.

Anyway, you should have no trouble finding friends in the fandom. In case you were unaware, furries who are 30 and over are known as greymuzzles (I agree that’s a little young to be considered old, but, again, it has to do with demographics). You can find greymuzzle groups online at places like Furry4Life and Facebook (I founded a greymuzzle FB group, actually). These groups will all welcome you with open arms, never fear.

Furcons in the U.S. (and I’m assuming you are aware that Australia has Confurgence in Melbourne) often include a forum for greymuzzles, so I would check out the program schedule of the con you plan to attend and see if they have a greymuzzle meet. 

As for only becoming active recently in the fandom, that’s okay, too. Whether young or old, many in the fandom have only been active for fewer than five years. Take yours truly. While I consider myself a lifelong furry (having been into it as a child before I was familiar with the term) I have only really been active since my early 40s. There are a lot of greymuzzles like you and me, Antares.

So, while your age does set you apart somewhat from the younger furries, you will have no trouble whatsoever integrating into the furry community. Indeed, probably a lot of American furries will find your Australian accent and international perspective charming and intriguing. See if you can connect with some greymuzzles who will, hopefully, be at the convention(s) you plan to attend, and you will have a grand time. You are never too old to be a furry.

Cheers,

Papabear

Author: Hey Papabear, (I came to you before but I never heard back on that subject. You don’t need to get back on that. It’s been solved.) I am sorry in advance if I may sound too whiney or rant-ish in this letter but I am still emotional. I am a female. I am very […]

Author: Smokescale Aquatos Welcome to Fuzzy Logic Episode 90! Guilty Pleasures! After a prolonged absence, Kyo makes an auspicious return! Yay! Fox is back! Discussions start off with the saga of the noob drawing to a close at long last! YAY! …unfortunately, the Smokey now has all of the overtime trying to catch up. Oh […] Fuzzy Logic: Episode 90 – Guilty Pleasures