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so /u/CeresSergal requested me to do an AMA here. I can't imagine what you guys could possibly wanna know about me, buuuut... here goes x3

FurAffinity: http://www.furaffinity.net/user/thesepantsdontfit/

DeviantART: http://thesepantsdontfit.deviantart.com/

ASK ME ANYTHING

submitted by mrmattsir
[link] [102 comments]

Hello, Papa Bear,

Its me again and first sorry for another letter I have a lot on my shoulders lately. Anyway, me and my friends are going through some rough ends. Not long ago my best friend (Amanda) had a birthday party and invited me, and 3 other girls. One of them was our best friend. The others I knew just never really hung out with.

Anyways, because me, Amanda and Alyssa (the best friend) haven't seen each other in awhile we decided to have a sleepover. Then Olivia (one of the girls I don't really hang out with) wanted to come. So because I knew her pretty well, and everyone begged me. I said yes. We had some fun, and all, but I felt they weren't including me in anything. They didn't do anything I wanted to do because I thought, since they were my guests we had to do whatever they wanted. So they mostly played on my Wii. Though I didn't join because I only have 3 remotes and there was four of us. So I mostly began to feel sad, and depressed. During the sleepover my two best friends seemed to not act like themselves. Alyssa, who loves animals, started acting as if they were nothing which is something she would never do. Amanda, just hardly noticed me which is normally a first. And Olivia, she is just one of those punk, like girls, and I don't really get along with those type of people very well.

I mentioned this on a furry forum and some of my friends on it said to pull them aside and talk to them about this. So I did and it failed. They started acting mean towards me and saying I just want others’ pity. Which isn't true at all. So we haven't talked and things are awkward between us, and my question is, how can I apologize for all of this? I just want us to be friends again. Thank you.

Sorry this was long.

Topaz (age 12)
 
* * *
 
Hi, Topaz,
 
Papabear suspects he knows what’s going on here. It centers around this girl Olivia. She’s kinda the cool kid, I bet. And I bet Amanda and Alyssa wanted to impress her; this explains why their behavior changed. Bet you that Olivia doesn’t share Alyssa’s love of animals, so she suppressed it so that Olivia would like her more. I also suspect the main reason they wanted to come to your home wasn’t because of you but because of your Wii.
You’re not the one who needs to apologize; they are. It was extremely rude of them to hog your Wii and leave you sitting there. Only three controllers? Fine, take turns playing. Have three people play for a while, then low score has to sit out while the next person takes over, and so on. Easy solution, but no one proposed that, did they? And you were too polite and trying too hard to be a good hostess to insist they share your game system.

Topaz, in a way, you are at an unenviable age when you have to deal with social cliques all the time. And social cliques can morph constantly in the school years. One day you may find yourself fully accepted in a certain social group, and the next, without even knowing why, you are given the boot. Usually this is because a certain clique—large or small—gets a new member or members who is envied by the original members and anyone who doesn’t likewise want to be like the cool people will be pushed out. Cliques can grow, or shrink, split into multiple different cliques, or merge into supercliques.

In this interesting article from PsychCentral, Marie Hartwell-Walker, a doctor of education, explains how there can be two types of social groups in school: clicks and cliques. I have been talking about cliques, which are unhealthy, but Hartwell-Walker also explains there can be social groups that are healthy and are composed of friends who “click” together.

What you used to have with Alyssa, Amanda, and you was a click. Three friends who had similar interests and liked hanging out. Now, with the introduction of Olivia, the group is morphing into a clique—an unhealthy group of people with weak self-esteem who want to be part of a “cool” crowd and show themselves as superior to others (read the article, it’s very helpful).

At this point, sadly, it sounds as if you are a click member who now is being slowly squeezed out of a group that has turned into a clique. If you want your friends back, there are two potential options: 1) you can suck up to Olivia and try to be just like her in the same way that Alyssa and Amanda are, or 2) you can try and keep Olivia out of your relationship with Alyssa and Amanda. Invite A and A to do super-fun stuff together without O and reinforce your bond with the two girls and make yourself the cooler choice in their eyes.

The good news is that it sounds like you have other friends. Good for you! In case the two As decide they want to be with O more than you (something you can only try to influence not to happen but have no ultimate control over), you still have other options in friends.

This is not a reflection on you; this doesn’t mean you aren’t friend-worthy. It means that Amanda and Alyssa are becoming social climbers who think it’s more important to look cool than to be genuine friends.

It’s sad, I know. It’s not hopeless yet, but be prepared for the possibility they might not be your friends much longer. It’s one of those painful lessons in life everyone goes through. The longer you live, the more friends you will lose.... But don’t worry!!! You will also make many new friends along the way. As you do, you will learn a lot about friendship, both how to pick better-quality friends and how to be a better friend yourself.

Wish You Luck!
Papabear

Submitted by Fred Patten, Furry’s favorite historian and reviewer. Ocelot: Le Chat Qui N’en Était Pas Un, by Jean David Morvan & Séverine Tréfouël [writers] and Agnès Fouquart [art]. Paris, Delcourt, August 2015, hardcover €12,50 (48 pages), Kindle free. Thanks once again to Lex Nakashima for this fine example of the French bande dessinée. If […]

submitted by Bleatley
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submitted by TriggerTheWolf
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My uni has been on a very volatile state lately, but tests have ended and we're close to (Finally) finishing the semester. Today I must take my courses; and then i can focus on your requests that i've let go for almost month without finishing them T.=.T

I promise to finish them ok? If I fix the drawing tablet my brother gave me i can even color them, but that come later ok?

And sorry again for being so late :(

submitted by nike1155
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I've been drawing furries for a while, and decided the other day to start a comic, with a complex world and a grown up story (like with politics, battles and maybe the occasional naughty page) I've decided to involve many different species in the comic and. Have come across a problem, how do i make ratmorph look more unique than just a mouse with grey fur? Anyone got any guides for drawing all of the rodents :)?

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So me and a few furs were wondering how it seems like a lot of furries are able to go to multiple cons a year and I mean more then 3 or 4 and all across the country from AC to ANE and rainfurest, etc. How do you guys that are able to do this balance time off from work, travel and cost ?

I only ask because I really want to be able to go to more cons and am having a hard time with a balance, thanks

submitted by Shadowwolf67
[link] [10 comments]

People often rag on a style of lighting and shading that is probably most popularized by the artist Miles-DF (NSFW), where fur looks extremely smooth and shiny, almost as if it is just oily, colored skin. Examples: 1 2 (these might be considered NSFW). Obviously, some people might not like this style because we're furries, we like our anthros to have fur instead of skin.

I admit I don't particularly care for that look all too much when it is over-done or poorly done, but I recently realized why that style might actually be just a little justified. Anthro fur could be comparable to very short and soft velour. Velour is extremely shiny when viewed at certain angles, sometimes excessively so. It is also pretty damn soft. Some might worry than an athro would feel more like a window curtain rather than a soft and fluffy animal-person, but anthro body fur might be somewhere in-between the two; having the shiny properties of velour, while retaining the feeling of finely-groomed fur. Other areas like chest and neck floof would be real fur, of course. So furries are still pretty highly snuggle-able even if this is true.

I just thought that this could at least partially justify an art style that is pretty commonly looked down upon, or at least it is in my circles and the places I frequent.

submitted by GoldenDiamonds56
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