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U.S. government petitioned to drop drug war, create cat girls

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NekoThe U.S. administration created We The People to provide a place for any of its citizens to petition the White House, which has promised to provide an official response to all petitions reaching 25?000 signatures within 30 days. While some cover serious political issues, it's doubtful that they expected Matthew H's petition for domestic cat girls. [Yahoo!]

Matthew contends that the War on Drugs is pointless, and that money would be better spent by genetically engineering cat girls for home services.

While reports by the Global Commission on Drug Policy suggest the war has been a dramatic and costly waste of money, lives and society, and has harmed the fight against HIV/AIDS, it is unlikely that the U.S. will abandon it any time soon. Both Colorado and Washington have legalised non-medicinal marijuana, but its possession is still a federal offence.

Even if the White House were to respond to the petition, it would almost certainly be dismissed. There are strong opponents to the sort of research needed to realise genetically-engineered cat girls and the legality of that research differs greatly from place to place. The UK allows human-animal hybrids provided the embryo is destroyed within 14 days, but there have been calls for tighter regulation, and Flayrah has reported that such hybrids are illegal in Arizona. In Ohio, Senate Bill 94 has been proposed to ban their creation.

The petition now has 1012 signatures, and requires another 23?000 by the 19th or it will be thrown out. If your imagination or a fursuit isn't doing it for you anymore, your best bet may be to follow in the footsteps of the late Stalking Cat and opt for surgical modifications.


Your rating: None Average: 4.7 (3 votes)

Oh god, why do they have to do this? xD

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Signed and shared on my mundane Facebook account.

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It'd be amusing if this article gets shared amongst furs and the petition actually reaches 25?000. :p

"If all mankind minus one, were of one opinion, and only one person were of the contrary opinion, mankind would be no more justified in silencing that one person, than he, if he had the power, would be justified in silencing mankind."
~John Stuart Mill~

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Unfortunately they've tried this before multiple times without the genetic cat provision and it succeeded once and Obama's response was to laugh it off.

Yeah, pot's hilarious, especially when a future president will probably start using the FBI to go after people in Colorado and Washington and trounce on state's rights. It'll be a real "riot" I'm sure.

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Tried to get the money from the War on Drugs put somewhere constructive?

"If all mankind minus one, were of one opinion, and only one person were of the contrary opinion, mankind would be no more justified in silencing that one person, than he, if he had the power, would be justified in silencing mankind."
~John Stuart Mill~

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There was a petition about just ending the Drug War. Obama said something along the line of "shows what kind of people are online." or something like that.

The fact he hasn't attacked Colorado or Washington yet is promising. The DEA might not choose to wait for the president to make a decision and my choose to force their hand anyway. I mean, it's a threat to their livelihoods after all.

Time will tell, don't think the whole modified cat servant thing will help the debate. Especially since we outlawed slavery and such.

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I think the guy must have been smoking something.
Being in Oregon I wonder how the new legalization law this would affect Rainfurrest. I will not go because I will be unemployed. Still I would be looking for works and do want to ingest somebody's homemade bake good and fail a drug screening.

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You're probably refering to that Colorado incident which happened on a college campus where students brought in refer laced baked goods. They were arrested because apparently drugging someone against their consent is still illegal (duh-oi) and if you accidentally ingest some because someone didn't label them and someone is arrested as a result I'm sure your employer would be understanding.

That and why the heck would you accept random baked goods at a furry convention anyway? Not the wisest thing. I mean, I've never seen baked goods at any furry convention.

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It happened to a couple of my artist friends at FWA one year. They were kinda pissed, 'cause they were meant to be selling their wares in the Dealers' Den, but found themselves incapable of doing so.

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We shall defend God's gift whatever the cost may be; we shall smoke on the beaches; we shall smoke on collage grounds; we shall smoke in the fields and in the streets; we shall smoke in the hills. We shall never surrender our stash! And, even if, which I do not for a moment believe, we were to remain subjugated and persecuted by these evil corporations, then our enlightened friends beyond the seas would carry on the struggle, until in God's good time, the New World, with all its re-discovered hemp based power and might, steps forth to the rescue and the liberation of the Old. —Winstone Hempchill

Your rating: None Average: 5 (3 votes)

Collage grounds?

What, are you going to light up on a pile of cut-up magazines?

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I think they should legalize pot for no other reason than it will force stoner comics to write some actual material.

"I think they should legalize pot," and that's apparently the punchline, because that's all we get. I'm sure that this was fucking hilarious when you wrote, but you were high. Everything is fucking hilarious when you're high.

Unfortunately, I'm not high, so I'm going to need a real joke over here.

Your rating: None Average: 3.5 (2 votes)

I think it should be legalized because the government could get some serious tax money off the commercialized sale of cannabis products (like tea!).

Plus it would reduce the amount of adolescents who use it because "look how counterculture I am, Mom!"

Your rating: None Average: 1.7 (7 votes)

Ho hum. Another stupid joke of a petition, like the 'Death Star' one, which, again like the 'Death Star' one, won't ever get enacted and in fact will instead just be seized upon by the Crazy Right as an excuse to fire out some inflammatory, anti-Obama fundraising e-mails.

While we're on the subject of politics: people keep telling me that Paden Reilly has no chance of ever being elected to anything important. Well, he just might if he was backed up by a million dollars of WorldNetDaily donations, plus a few Joe Mayer cartoons depicting him as a jolly japer, while his Democrat opponent didn't have any money to advertise because you were all too busy toking to donate.

"Oh, but dope helps me to relax," I'm told.

Furries -- for as long as you continue to give succour to the likes of Beiro, Greenwald, Reddick and Reilly, you don't deserve to relax.

Your rating: None Average: 3.3 (3 votes)

Who are you and why should we care

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Guess how much Obama cares about this catgirls-and-dope petition? Guess what the chances are of catgirls and dope being made legal across the US, regardless of how many furries fill it out amidst a cloud of reefer fumes?

About a quadrillion times *less* than you care about me!

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But see, the thing is, nobody thinks this petition is going to do any good. Nobody is taking this seriously, so you're just being annoying thinking any of us are. Have a little faith in our fucking intelligence, please.

Man, I am on a roll with this use of bold today; who else wants to aggravate me?

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"Have a little faith in our fucking intelligence, please."

Furries keep cheering Paden Reilly whenever he walks past in the fursuit parade; keep giving Allan Greenwald money; keep giving Jim Groat lifts to all the furcons; keep putting Ross Reddick up for the night; keep white-knighting for all of the above.

I try, but it's very hard.

Your rating: None Average: 5 (2 votes)

I don't know who any of those people are, but here's the thing:

People are allowed to have any political beliefs they want.

If I stopped being kind to someone every time I found out they were a conservative, I'd lose a lot of good friends.

Giving someone a lift to a furry convention is a far cry from voting against one's own personal beliefs.

In addition, I have no idea what any of those people had to do with an online petition meant in jest, at all.

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"People are allowed to have any political beliefs they want."

Amidst the general population, yes, but this isn't the general population.

When you belong to a minority culture, a maligned subculture, its members have a right to expect other members not to vote, promote, act or otherwise agitate against that (sub-)culture's interests.

There's a reason the French film directors' guild kicked Claude Autant-Lara out of their ranks once he started going on about how the Holocaust didn't happen and was just Communist propaganda; there's a reason Bernie Madoff wouldn't be welcome at his local synagogue even if he did get out of jail; there's a reason Ken Mehlman doesn't get invited to many gay-pride parades, and it's not because he'd look ghastly in sequins, dah-ling.

Even French freakin' film directors have more sense than furries, and that is nothing to be proud of.

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Um, excuse me, what exactly are the "interests" of the furry subculture that can be voted against?

Because if voting for [insert politician here] means I'm not allowed to draw cartoons anymore, I can see your point. Otherwise...not so much.

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Alas, it seems with 23,827 signatures to go in four days, this one won't pass.

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I think the President might have more important things on his mind right now, don't you?

Keep an eye out for crazy fundie pronouncements on the tragedy from the usual furry suspects, too.

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Well, wouldn't be any worse then the "blame the guns" democrats or, "blame the video games so they don't blame the guns" republicans.

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PS: I'm pretty sure the creation of sapient animal-human hybrids for merchandising / labor purposes would violate the 13th Amendment.

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That depends on whether they are still regarded as homo sapiens, or people. Non-persons are not regarded as slaves.

As ‘slavery’ and ‘involuntary servitude’ are uniquely human activities, as those terms have been historically and contemporaneously applied, there is simply no basis to construe the Thirteenth Amendment as applying to non-humans.

The only reasonable interpretation of the 13th Amendment's plain language is that it applies to persons and not to non-persons such as orcas.

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You want to sign a White House petition? Sign this one instead:

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I'm not sure what the point of that is. Any normal person can recognise them as a hate group but so what? I'm not aware of them harming people, just protesting and making their opinions heard. That's the entire point of free speech, to allow even those whose speech you find offensive to say their piece. That was tested by the US supreme court and it was found that their protests were completely within the law. That's one of the judgements that actually affords the US some respect in my books. You can't force someone not to hate nor would that be a good thing. This petition is just as hateful as the Westboro Baptist Church protests.

"If all mankind minus one, were of one opinion, and only one person were of the contrary opinion, mankind would be no more justified in silencing that one person, than he, if he had the power, would be justified in silencing mankind."
~John Stuart Mill~

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Here in America if you consider yourself a religious organization you can get a tax exemption (IRS is the entity that handles our taxes). They are basically asking for the government to investigate the Westboro group to see if they are claiming religious tax exemption and to withdraw it.

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I don't think religious groups should get tax exemption but whether they are a hate group or not doesn't mean that they aren't also a religious group. Indeed it seems like the hate part stems from the religious part.

"If all mankind minus one, were of one opinion, and only one person were of the contrary opinion, mankind would be no more justified in silencing that one person, than he, if he had the power, would be justified in silencing mankind."
~John Stuart Mill~

Your rating: None Average: 3.8 (5 votes)

In the case of Westboro yes, they have been politically involved and seem to use their money to create lawsuits instead of helping the poor and needy. However, other religious organizations which aren't sensationalist and as a result aren't well known because they're acting "normal" act basically as a voluntary tax organization whose donations actually go to help the poor. Something the government should encourage, lest our actual taxes have to go up. If the people can help themselves they don't need the government so much.

It is important though that they go after those that abuse the exemptions. Of course this would draw complaints from some religious (particularly those that abuse it) that the government is oppressing their freedom of speech or whatnot. Of course Westboro has far enough evidence that they're not a charitable organization. In fact their roster which was posted mainly consists of 2 families.

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This! Just...this...This goes to show how freaking STUPID humans can be! Although I fully support the use of pot, I can see why there needs to be police cracking down on drugs such as cocaine and meth and jailing the people who make and distribute such dangerous drugs. Those drugs are dangerous and they not only drive people to do bad things but can cause all kinds of deadly health issues. Not to mention, if the Drug Wars were to be completely cancelled, I personally think the money that could have been used to support the police should be used for something more important to the good of society such as education and welfare instead of towards the creation of genetically-engineered sex slaves! I mean, that's just immoral!

Think a little bit, people!

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About the author

Rakuen Growlitheread storiescontact (login required)

a student and Growlithe from South Africa/Austria, interested in science, writing, pokemon and gaming

I'm a South African fur, born and raised in Cape Town, but currently living in Vienna, Austria for work and studies. I'm interested in science, writing, gaming, all sorts of furry stuff, Pokemon and some naughtier things too! I've dabbled in art before but mostly like writing although I haven't done very many stories recently but more non-fiction on Flayrah. I also helped found and administer the ZA Fur forum.