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Review: 'My Little Pony: The Movie' (2017)

Your rating: None Average: 3.5 (14 votes)

The poster for My Little Pony, The Movie"I guess I just sort of ... grew up."
Ask Jappleack

"Me too!"
— "What Good Will Wishing Do?", My Little Pony: The Movie (1986) (my review)

It's been seven years to the day since My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic was first aired, and the geek world changed that day.

So let's talk about the 2017 movie. As far as the story goes, it's pretty bog-standard at this point for MLP:FiM. Bad guy appears (the Storm King, voiced by Liev Schreiber), three of the four magical alicorn princesses prove themselves worthless by getting instantly captured, so it's up to the fourth princess and series protagonist, Twilight Sparkle (voiced by Tara Strong), with her six friends - Applejack (voiced by Ashleigh Ball), Fluttershy (voiced by Andrea Libman), Pinkie Pie (also voiced by Libman), Rainbow Dash (also voiced by Ball), Rarity (voiced by Tabitha St. Germain) and Spike (voiced by Cathy Weseluck) - to save the land of Equestria with the magic of friendship. Which they used to be able to straight-up shoot people with, but they lost that ability back in season four.

The Storm King isn't a very hands-on villain at first. He sends an army of minions with his underling, Tempest (voiced by Emily Blunt) - a unicorn with a broken horn, facial scar and general bad attitude (but sick soccer skills!) - to capture the princesses and steal their magic. Twilight is led to believe the hippogriffs are her only chance to save the already-captured princesses, so after an escape, the team heads south across a desert that just kind of inexplicably appears. Not that geography was ever the show's strong point.

Capper, an anthro-cat with orange fur, green eyes and wearing a red coat.Along the way, the team meets new friends, because of course they do. I mean, it's kind of the point. There's a crew of pirate parrots and the sea ponies. And since they're traveling south of Equestria in unfriendly territory, some of these new friends may not be very trustworthy at first. Like a con-man cat-man named Capper (voiced by Taye Diggs). Just another talking cartoon animal in a cartoon about talking animals, right? But when you stop and think about it, isn't he hands-down the furriest thing to ever appear in any My Little Pony show?

So we've got a lot of characters, and fans might be disappointed that a lot of the supporting cast are relegated to background cameos. A few "back at the ranch" scenes of occupied Equestria featuring them wouldn't have been out of place. Although some of them might've been able to fight off the Storm King's army on their own, or at least warn Tempest that the plan wouldn't work.

Of course, since we've got seven main cast members, we're already pretty high on the character count from the get-go. In the show, characters can take turns in the lead spot. In the movie, Fluttershy is basically useless. I don't mean useless as she was in the show's early run, but she just doesn't get to do much. Applejack has her rope, Rainbow Dash can fly and sing about pirates, and Rarity gets to be comic relief. Yes, Rarity, because Pinkie Pie gets to be the voice of reason/heart of the team, and that's a choice. A choice that works surprisingly well, but it's still a choice. (I would've picked Applejack).

Twilight, meanwhile, as the protagonist, has got to have a story arc, despite the fact that she really should be better at this since she's seen Equestria in serious trouble about once a year for the last six years. I get that she needs to have an arc for dramatic reasons, but at this point she's earned an over-confident rather than an under-confident arc for once.

The new supporting characters seem to trust the ponies a little too easily. Despite being a cynical hustler, Capper the cat joins up because Rarity gives him some shiny coat buttons. To be fair, all he originally thought he had to do was to lie to Tempest, saying "They went that way!" when they went the other. But then Tempest takes him hostage. And the pirates get their airship crashed while the ponies sneak out the back. How does this endear the ponies to them, exactly?

I realize I'm being more negative than I want to be, but I was a bit disappointed. This film was supposed to be a masterpiece, but mostly it's just okay. That includes the songs, which weren't distracting, but they weren't very memorable, either. And the animation, which got a major bump over the regular show, also featured some really obvious CG objects shoved into the 2D animation, and that was kind of annoying. I had more fun with the Equestria Girls movie, despite the fact that that movie's basic concept felt like a slap to the face of what the franchise was about.

But here's the thing, I wasn't the only one when I went to see Equestria Girls. I saw it in a crowded theater full to the brim with excited bronies, generally amused little girls, a couple of slightly panicked-looking parents, and my brother who I'd dragged along. I saw this new 2017 movie in the exact same theater, but there was only one other guy on opening night (technically Thursday night "previews", but whatever). At one point in the movie, the villain exclaims he's totally "over this cute pony thing", and I guess we all are.

Glass half-full. I mean, it's still an okay movie. I still liked being able to watch it. And that in itself is kind of a miracle. The show it's based on is actually really good, though. It's so good, that for the new My Little Pony: The Movie, being okay is nowhere near good enough.

Comments

Your rating: None Average: 3.8 (4 votes)

I liked the first half of your review more than the second. I will agree, I've heard it not being full and I saw it on a preview day as well and there really weren't too many people there. But I will just make some quick notes that about things I think should've been mentioned. For example, how totally awesome Tempest (and her voice!) is.

This hippogriff thing really comes out of nowhere. Why was Luna going to go to them? Why not the dragons? They friends with the Dragon Lord. Why not the Changelings? Again, friends with the Changeling King. But instead they are going to some group that we've never heard of and have no friendly relationships with? That's just weird.

Capper is certainly the furriest character we've seen but the diamond dogs were also furry, just ugly. There's also Iron Will who is pretty close (my weird hang ups with canon and mythology notwithstanding). Also, although Capper seems like a big con man, if you read the prequel comic, you will learn he grew up as a thief but wants to leave that life behind. In fact he's in debt because his previous plan to leave a life of crime behind was ruined by someone betraying him.

Rarity, Fluttershy and Applejack are all pretty much useless here. They have some nice bits but the other three are the ones driving everything forward. The problem is, that really shows. In the series, they just leave the superfluous ponies out of the episodes but here they were dragged along for no reason. Also because of development timing, there's a big elephant in the room with Starlight being there, us knowing Starlight is equal to or superior in ability to Twilight but she has no influence on the plot. Same with Discord, who can literally do anything and who is just never mentioned despite almost being guaranteed an invitation to such an event.

Pinkie and Rainbow do their bits really well but to me, Twilight's mess up is just out of character. It would've happened in the early seasons but she has developed too much to mess up so badly. I don't think it fits her and I think it is a decision that is purely driven by what the plot demands.

Overall, I think the plot is absolutely generic and didn't try do anything new. However, I think it was fun (I still need to rewatch it) and I think it was beautiful. The songs were really catchy and I've spent the last few days listening to them. The obvious CGI with the airship wasn't ideal and some of the jokes were a bit weak but I did enjoy the direction they took things and especially some of the... accessories the ponies wore later on.

It could certainly be better, particularly plotwise, but it was still fun and that is an important part of it.

"If all mankind minus one, were of one opinion, and only one person were of the contrary opinion, mankind would be no more justified in silencing that one person, than he, if he had the power, would be justified in silencing mankind."
~John Stuart Mill~

Your rating: None

Re Starlight and Discord: doesn't "it's set earlier" answer any/all questions about those issues? Not that that's been asserted AFAIK but it seems like the absence of Discord and Starlight kind of suggests it.

Re Twilight being conveniently out of character: totally agree. And it's hardly the first time an MLP plot depended on "Twi does something foolish".

Re Tempest is awesome: absolutely!

And re your summary: couldn't agree more! The plot is so basic, but Ingram's music is remarkable and the somewhat dialed-up art investment - at least for a fan of the show - is lovely.

I think it was Vox's critic (could be wrong) that said it felt less like the triumphant blast of a show at its peak and more like a trophy for a show which is maybe past its prime but deserves some recognition for what it achieved. Begrudgingly, that sounds fair to me. I love it because I love the show, not because it was - in isolation - the best example of what MLPFIM can be.

Your rating: None

According to the Biggest Jim Miller, the producer, the move is set between season 7 and 8. https://www.equestriadaily.com/2017/10/the-my-little-pony-movie-takes-place.html

Your rating: None

Aha, missed that. Well then, as Rakuen said - it's kinda glaringly weird that Glimmy and Discord don't turn up. Hey ho.

Your rating: None

Not really. Starlight Glimmer could have been visiting Sunburst.

Discord could have been off doing whatever reformed lords of chaos do (what irks me more is that 'discord' and 'chaos' doesn't mean evil. it literally just means disorder and confusion. disorder isn't evil. it can be used for good too. ><)

Your rating: None

Not so with Starlight. She appears early on alongside Trixie, during the "We Got This" musical number I think?

Your rating: None Average: 4 (3 votes)

Nah, it's 8/10.

Well, I'll be...

Your rating: None Average: 4.7 (3 votes)

It really just seemed like a regular, early episode with a better animation budget and dragged out for longer. It wouldn't even have been one of the better episodes. And a lot of the jokes seemed like they had written something in to be improved later and then forgot to do it. (Haven't they already made a lions and tigers and bears, oh my joke?)

I wonder if some of the characters they introduced will appear in the show?

Your rating: None Average: 4.7 (3 votes)

Maybe not, but you can guarantee they'll appear in the store. I mean, Capper is just dapper. (His last name is Dapperpaws.)

Your rating: None Average: 4 (1 vote)

Dapperpaws? Awww! That's the cutest thing I've ever heard!

Your rating: None Average: 3 (1 vote)

Pinkie Pie gets to be the voice of reason/heart of the team

this was such a weird choice to me. but it also made kind of sense.

I liked the movie, my theater was a little more full.

Compared to the 1986 movie this was much better. It and Transformers won't cause Jem and the Holograms not to get a theater release grumbles

Your rating: None Average: 2 (1 vote)

Capper General.

Well, I'll be...

Your rating: None Average: 4 (1 vote)

I have to sort of agree with the review. I think I liked the music better though. The animation was great. The story just wasn't that special. It was like an extended season opener or closer with a non-descript villian that we'd never even heard mention of before and who will be just as quickly forgotten now that he's gone. He was arguably the weakest and least intimidating of the villians as well as being the most whiny. I got the feeling Tempest was actually more powerful until she gave him his new toy. My other complaint was the number of new characters introduced. THey were all interesting in themselves, but none got much character development. Just exactly where did Capper come from.....oh yeah, Puss in Boots. We all knew we were getting sea ponies. Would it have been too much to given them more than just a fast cameo for merchandising (since they were transformed hippogryphs it was a twofer). I get why no transformed changelings or Starlight Glimmer. Neither were established by the time the screenplay for this was being written, but no gryphons, no dragons (Spike doesn't count)? It was entertaining enough and I'm glad I watched it, but I was certainly hoping for more.

Your rating: None Average: 1.6 (11 votes)

...I think this was my favorite movie of the year. It filled my heart with joy and hope like no other I've seen so far. The themes and ideas are rich even by the standards of an already great show. I loved Queen Novo and Caper.

Tempest Shadow was also a great villain. She reminded me a lot of feminists in how cold and calculating she was. I was terrified during her song, and believe me, it's hard to scare a real man like myself. Her character did a lot for the film's overall message as well.

Not sure I would've gone with Sia for the soundtrack, but she did great and I would even go as far as to say she's on par with Shakira.

Your rating: None Average: 4 (2 votes)

oh come on

Your rating: None Average: 2.3 (3 votes)

You need to get out and see more movies. Yeah, it's got decent animation and awesome music, and... that's about it. There's really nothing special or outstanding that makes this stand out from a typical MLP episode (aside from the new characters). Not sayin' it's bad, just bland. If anything, this movie is a obvious cash-in just to squeeze out a few extra bucks from the MLP:FIM fan base and sell more toys...

Your rating: None Average: 3.5 (4 votes)

You're like one of those commenters on YouTube, news sites and old ass forums who basically plays a character and is really, really fucking dedicated to never breaking kayfabe. The difference between that and a troll? Sincerity and having a life.

Your rating: None Average: 1 (3 votes)

LOL are you saying that internet trolls have lives?

Your rating: None Average: 3 (3 votes)

She reminded me a lot of feminists in how cold and calculating she was.

trolls are gonna troll.

I was terrified during her song, and believe me, it's hard to scare a real man like myself.

apparently it doesn't take much if a 'real man' got scared by a kid's movie.

Your rating: None Average: 1 (5 votes)

Dude, she was a feminist. She's the only feminist character on the series. Except maybe if you count Chrysalis.

Everyone else is like Ann Coulter.

Your rating: None Average: 1.5 (2 votes)

If everyone else was like Ann the man Coulter they'd be ugly, stupid as a bag of nails and complaining about how this took up 1000 bits worth of hours. they'd be a cold hearted demon hellbent on destroying Equestria.

Your rating: None Average: 1 (5 votes)

No, they wouldn't.

Princess Celestia is literally Steve Bannon.

Your rating: None Average: 1.7 (3 votes)

Princess Celestia isn't an evil racist nazi son of a bitch hellbent on destroying her nation that she proclaims to love simply to make her enemies cry.

Not only is it stupid to make the comparison, it shows that you know literally nothing about my little pony. it's clear you're just here to troll.

so you want to play the troll game? I can do that.

From this point forward, every time you comment, the only word that you'll see in reply is dotard.

Would you like to...play a game?

Your rating: None Average: 1.3 (3 votes)

The fact that my comparison has you at the point of only being able to call me a troll is magnificent.

And if Celestia actually did that, I'm not going to lie, that would be badass.

Your rating: None Average: 3.8 (4 votes)

Hey guys, I'm filling out paperwork for a lawsuit, and I need some names here, my attorney says that they can't serve a summons to an "Ike the Dragon (visitor)", but I really need the medical bills for the incurable pancreatic hernia this thread gave me to be covered. Thanks.

Your rating: None Average: 1 (5 votes)

dotard.

Your rating: None Average: 5 (1 vote)

Using the word "literally" a bit liberally, there, Ike.

Your rating: None Average: 3 (7 votes)

To be fair, there can be scenes in kids movies that are genuinely scary. Most Don Bluth films contain a few. But I still think anyone legit scared by anything in MLP is a pussy. Also, the thought of Ann Coulter as a pony is utterly horrifying. It'd have a neck like a giraffe with a massive adams apple and the face and eyes of a mule if it was raised on a strict diet of rusty tin cans and crystal meth.

Your rating: None Average: 1.2 (5 votes)

It'd be hot and you know it

Your rating: None Average: 3 (3 votes)

Once again, you somehow manage to make a fairly vanilla cartoon animal fetish insanely creepy on a furry site.

Your rating: None Average: 1.2 (5 votes)

You're just jealous because I have sexual interests in the first place.

Your rating: None Average: 4 (1 vote)

Well, anyway, your argument for a conservative reading isn't very well thought out here; in fact it seems to boil down to "ponies are hot, Ann Coulter is hot; Ann Coulter is conservative, ponies are conservative", which is, shall we say, a leap of logic (and that's even granting you either Coulter's or the ponies' sexual attractiveness). I mean, I don't know why this is your particular hobby-horse (pun not intended), seeing non-existent conservative messages in cartoons. Isn't that a major talking point with conservatives? Liberal Hollywood media elitists?

I mean, I suppose you're just trolling, trying to get a reaction from the other commenters, but, come on. Oh, wow, you got crossaffliction to post a comment ... on Flayrah! Such a rare occurrence!

I mean, you got anything besides "it's conservative" to recommend the movie? Sure, I like a little SJW cuckery along with my cinematography, but it's not like Rango, The Grey or Gravity had much to say on the political spectrum. What I'm trying to say is get a hobby, dude.

Otherwise, I mean, like I told Blue Sky or whoever the fuck he was, you're boring in your mono-mania.

Also, I thought of a joke response after I posted earlier to the Bannon/Celestia comparison, and you know, what, you are right. They are same, at least in the movie; both white, completely ineffective and sidelined early.

Your rating: None Average: 1 (2 votes)

Nice to see that even when you take the moral high ground your anti-white sentiment still shines through.

Why can't one talk about their hobbies in a political manor? Haven't you seen all the Youtube channels just dedicated to political meanings in films? Haven't you seen the books and documentaries on the subject? Plenty of people can enjoy a film on it's own merits but there's nothing wrong with saying you should watch this movie or TV show because it appeals to you on a political level.

And yeah, I can enjoy an apolitical film just like anyone else. I really enjoyed 127 Hours and The Human Centipede. Just fun entertainment.

It's just that films with something to say tend to stick with me longer.

For someone who apparently doesn't care about this, you sure do seem angry. It's like when that guy tried saying that Belle fell in love with Beast because of his feminine side. But we all know it was because she wanted that monster dongus.

Now that's a bit more accurate.

Your rating: None Average: 4.7 (3 votes)

When did I say I don't care about this? I care deeply. I'm Flayrah's movie guy. Analyzing fucking movies might just be the equivalent of my fucking cutie mark, to swerve dangerously on topic for a second.

I am angry, you dipshit. I'm angry because you are doing it, just, so fucking wrong. Your politics suck bad enough, but oh my god, shut the fuck up, your stupid words are so fucking stupid it's like I'm a plumber watching someone try and fix a leak with a sledgehammer; I'm angry because you're doing it so wrong you're actually doing more damage and I'm the one who is going to have to fix it. I am the best qualified person here to tell you you are doing it wrong, so when I tell you you are doing it wrong, you are fucking doing it wrong. Please stop.

Once again, if you're actually not stupid enough to really believe your own bullshit, and just "jk,lol,trolling", well, fuck, once again, you made crossie angry on Flayrah. Wow, so impressive. Hint: Not a fucking rare occurrence, asshole. Rakuen has been doing it accidentally for over half a decade on average about once a month, so don't pat yourself on the back too much.

I am angry because stupidity makes me angry, and YOU are fucking stupid, man.

Your rating: None Average: 4 (1 vote)

IT'S A FREAKING DISNEY CARTOON FROM THE NINETIES.

IT IS NOT ABOUT DICK. JESUS CHRIST.

Your rating: None Average: 3 (1 vote)

But, anyway, I sorta kinda confirmed it on Twitter to my tens of followers, but The Howling Tuesday!

Your rating: None Average: 1 (1 vote)

your stupid words are so fucking stupid it's like I'm a plumber watching someone try and fix a leak with a sledgehammer;

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dHmBLbk_jyY

Your rating: None Average: 3 (1 vote)

Just thought I'd explain (sp)Ike The Dragon's mentality here. They're a passive aggressive personality; they will feel accomplished and satiated through making other people angry.

Specifically through non direct forms of anger generating tactics.
So for example, doubling down on their stupidity because it's pushing other people's buttons? Goal.

Your rating: None Average: 1 (1 vote)

Shut up Discord. We all know I'm as real as you get.

Your rating: None Average: 4 (1 vote)

See? OK Spike. ^.^ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D1BfXM11w_o
Aw, it's cute that youtube link has a little face at the end of it! w_o

Your rating: None Average: 1 (1 vote)

That's enough Discord. It's time we put your reign of terror to end.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z5gfb7VR1F8

Your rating: None Average: 3 (2 votes)

Best review of the film: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FnvzY7yIG0Q

Your rating: None Average: 1 (4 votes)

...And I'm just saying you have no real reason to be angry. I'm not causing damage just by saying my own opinion. If you don't like my opinion, you don't have to care. It's that simple.

Opinions are like assholes. Everyone has one.

Also, because you said 90s Disney movies had no dick involved, let me school you real quick:

The Little Mermaid is all about a mermaid who is willing to risk everything for some human dick.

Beauty and The Beast is about a girl falling for animal dick, while she herself is being pursued by an even bigger, more metaphorical dick.

Aladdin is about a princess who falls for some street rat because he's an alpha.

The Hunchback of Notre Dame's bad guy is a creepy beta who ends up pursuing a gypsie, the exact one who the other two prominent male characters have expressed affection for at some point.

Mulan is about a girl who can't fight for her own country because she's missing something...I can't remember what that would be.

The Lion King's titular protagonist even decides to leave the jungle after being introduced to....another word for cat.

Pocahontas, again, large part of the movie is her falling in love with some dangerous white man.

Tarzan, similar story, even with some potential sub textual penis envy involved.

The narrators of Hercules even sing about the main character like they want to sleep with him and you have two men competing over this bitch, and guess who's doing it for the pussy? That's right, the hero.

The only 90s Disney movie I can think of that meets your ideal criteria is Rescuers Down Under. Woo hoo. That's a high score.

If I was doing this to piss you off I would be insulting you more. I'm just pointing out how fucking wrong you are. Ans when your entire argument boils down to "I don't like you, so fuck you" that makes me feel like you might be the one in this for the lulz. Just to make yourself look better.

Even Friendship is Magic has some dick plot points if you need some good measure. I mean, it's never said, but we all know Twilight wants to bang Shining Armor.

Your rating: None Average: 3.5 (2 votes)

Did ... did you just say Twilight wants to fuck her brother?

I mean, I'm going to actually give you some credit here and guess you just got Shining Armor and Flash Sentry confused, but that last paragraph is so open to Freudian interpretation.

has some dick plot points if you need some good measure.

Oooh, Ike, are you flirting with me?

You seem to be an expert on cartoon cock, Ikey boy. Maybe it's not Twilight who's hot for Mr. Armor.

Your rating: None Average: 1 (3 votes)

It's not hard to see the freudian psychology of children's cartoons. Even Applejack's ideal man is essentially her brother.

That's why bad guys in children's media are usually asexual. It's because they likely didn't have very good role models of the opposite gender in their lives.

Your rating: None Average: 4 (1 vote)

So, either brother/sister incest is your thing (not the worst thing you can search tags for on e621) or you've learned from "the master" and are copying the Trump method of "if you say something stupid, don't apologize; double down".

Your rating: None Average: 2 (4 votes)

Wait, Jay Naylor's conservative webcomic "Better Days" took a sudden and unexpected trip down Sibling Humping Lane; is this like a thing with the right?

Your rating: None Average: 1 (3 votes)

Dude, the reason I and Trump both double down is because it's the alpha thing to do.

It's called self respect. I don't need to apologize for anything.

Your rating: None Average: 4 (2 votes)

Is it alpha to go onto websites for adult fans of talking cartoon animals and rainbow ponies to tell everyone that you're super alpha and Rainbow Dash would TOTALLY have sex with you?

Your rating: None Average: 1 (3 votes)

Yes it can be. Especially if you're telling the truth like I am.

Your rating: None Average: 1 (3 votes)

I mean, it's not like I see Rainbow Dash being into anybody else on this website either, so...

Your rating: None Average: 4 (1 vote)

A completely fictional character is into you in your imagination but not so much anyone else, because of all these amazing qualities you imagine yourself to have and that you imagine the rest of us not having. How convenient.

Your rating: None Average: 1 (3 votes)

Well it's not like you've shown these qualities in fact you actively shame me for having them.

So mind me for thinking that a woman with Rainbow Dash's personality would prefer Ike to men who don't think of themselves as being alphas.

Your rating: None Average: 3 (1 vote)

Rainbow Dash is not a woman. Rainbow Dash is a fictional blue pegasus with rainbow hair that reaches about the waist of a high school girl. A cartoon character. And a lesbian

Your rating: None Average: 1 (4 votes)

Are there people out there still trying to push that sick "Rainbow Dash is a canon lesbian because rainbow" shit?

Your rating: None Average: 1 (3 votes)

Mind me for thinking the only person who identifies as an alpha would be able to score with a girl like Rainbow Dash out of anyone else.

Your rating: None Average: 3 (1 vote)

You're so obsessed with being an "alpha", but I'd honestly be more interested if you'd try and be a "person" for a while, instead.

Doubling down on stupid may be "alpha", but it's also what we "beta cucks" like to call "double stupid". See, if you'd just had admitted "whoops, you got me, got confused between the two nearly identical generic characters that have had less development since their out of nowhere introductions than Derpy fucking Hooves" I'd actually have respected that response. Instead, you're all like, "yeah, no, man, I totally meant Twilight wants to fuck her brother, because that makes sense." This is what I mean when I say you're stupid.

I mean, and now you're bragging about your skills in boning fictional characters again, which is like me bragging about my skills in skeebledonking foofledoos; nobody cares because they're not real, stupid. I mean, we're literally having to explain to you that fictional characters aren't real. You can't bone Rainbow Dash because Rainbow Dash isn't real; whether you're a fucking alpha, beta or fucking charlie (that's Greek for C, right?) has no bearing whatsoever on the issue.

And if Rainbow Dash was real, I still wouldn't care who she wants to fuck, because that's hardly the most interesting thing about her!

Your rating: None Average: 1 (5 votes)

Dude the whole point is that I get all the girls because I'm an alpha and if you're not then you could probably learn a thing or two from me.

That and even the media you like shares my beliefs over yours.

Those are the only two things I've said so far but it's gotten all of you so angry for some reason.

Your rating: None Average: 3.7 (3 votes)

And then we keep explaining to you that we're angry at you because what you say is stupid (I literally said in a past comment "I am angry because stupidity makes me angry, and YOU are fucking stupid, man."), but you're so stupid you still have to ask why we're angry at you.

Furthermore, you keep saying you get all the girls, but you offer no proof of this, and the only names you drop in the "girls you could get with" category don't actually exist, which doesn't help your case. I'm sorry if it offends you that we don't take you at your word that you're drowning in pussy, but we don't trust you, and actually I'm pretty sure you're a virgin and/or closet gay.

Continuing from that, I don't have any real desire to be drowning in pussy myself, so, even setting aside the various flaws I see in your "alpha" obsession, and granting that you're not just talking out your ass, there's still just not a real advantage for me, here. Even if I did want to be an "alpha", you're not exactly making yourself the best example; I mean, as far as I can tell, all you do is ... argue with people online incessantly, which, I mean, if that's all the requirement, I am alpha as fuck already.

You have no personality, Ike. I literally have no idea what you mean when you say I should be like you, because you are a fucking cipher. What do you actually fucking do with your amazing alpha powers, anyway?

Your rating: None Average: 1.5 (2 votes)

Glad you asked. I'll have you know that I'm one of the most respected and envied people in my sphere. Even some of my own family members envy me!

When someone wrongs me, I always get back at them. Some way some how. I'm not desperate, but they need to know that once you wrong the Ike that means all limits are off. I've beaten others at their own craft, getting under their skin every time. I don't take kindly to losing.

They might not admit it, but my enemies are always searching for ways to win because they know I've already won. It's that simple.

Just like on this website. People were devastated by my Furry Media for Conservatives because of how alpha it was.

You know who else is alpha? Archie Bunker. Now that's a man's man!

Your rating: None Average: 2 (1 vote)

That's not what I was asking, Ike. I mean, what's your hobbies, man?

Your rating: None Average: 1 (1 vote)

Other than reviewing movies and TV along with discussing politics? I also write short stories and jog on my free time.

Your rating: None Average: 3.5 (2 votes)

Go on.

Most people enjoy talking about themselves, so, please, indulge yourself. I can only assure you, for what that's worth, I'm not digging for ammo in future arguments (of course, I'm only human; I may be unable to resist cheap shots).

Your rating: None Average: 2.7 (3 votes)

I own a DVD book with 76 DVDs, starting with the 1978 Invasion of the Body Snatchers.

Not much but it's a start.

I mostly read non-fiction because it appeals more to me. The only fiction books I've read in recent memory being The Stand and To Kill A Mockingbird.

Also, I might be the person behind this twitter account: https://twitter.com/InnerPartisan/status/862767706206085120

I might boast in conversation but I honestly don't like talking about myself that much. It just doesn't tickle my fancy.

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Also, if you don't know who this guy is, M M Myers is batshit crazy.

https://twitter.com/stillgray/status/920989664764248064

He even got in a fight with me on Twitter where his buddies jumped in on me. Guess who won? https://twitter.com/m_m_myers/status/861408892974112768

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So where do you post your movie/TV reviews or discuss politics? Surely you're not talking about here.

And why are we your "enemies"? Are you really spending your time here just to be adversarial?

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I'm apart of a private facebook group, that's where I do most of it on the internet.

You're only my "enemies" (and I use that term very lightly) because you've fought with me in the past. I do have actual people I dislike, but I don't consider you guys to be in that group per se.

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Man, if the regulars here regarded people we've had disagreements with as e-enemies, this place would have collapsed years ago.

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Dude, if you guys simply disagreed with me there wouldn't have been a fight. Instead you people act like cocky douche bags and constantly call me stupid

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If you don't remember, your first appearance here was people trying to discuss things with you in good faith, and you rambling about "rapefugees" and how we're jealous of your manliness.

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If you don't recall, I started talking about their jealous after they insulted me and rapefugees are a thing I was trying to bring awareness to.

If anything, calling them rapefugees is a bit too nice if you ask me. They should either be deported or shot on sight when they act like that for good measure.

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alphas still don't exist.

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And you're still wrong.

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Gonna have to disagree with you here:

Opinions are like assholes. Everyone has one.

Actually, my species doesn't; just kidneys, and presumably there's a way for waste water mixed with urea to emerge. Norns are clean burning! (Heart disease still exists.)

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And some creatures have cloca.

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Even Friendship is Magic has some dick plot points if you need some good measure. I mean, it's never said, but we all know Twilight wants to bang Shining Armor.

1. that's her brother
2. i knew conservative were into some sick crap but wow...

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Flash Sentry and her brother are the same dude. She wants to have sex with Flash because he has traits like that of Armor, being an alpha.

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Alphas don't exist, dotard, we've been over this.

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https://images.goasksuzie.com/2011/06/alpha-vs-beta-male-info-graphic.jpg

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Hi Perri.

I can post links too.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0Ti86veZBjU

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So let me get this straight. Aladdin is an "alpha". Why? Because he has a lucky break, finds a genie and wishes himself rich and royal?

Look, you need to learn to separate fiction from reality. At the end of the day, the reason any character falls for another character, especially in Disney movies, is because they were written to based on whatever flimsy logic the target audience (kids) will accept so that the plot can actually go somewhere.

There's a lot of people who look back on movies exactly like Beauty and the Beast and Aladdin and analyse just how "problematic" they are, and I tend to think those people might be taking them *a little* too seriously. You're basically the inverse of those people.

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Dude, Aladdin is an alphas. He meets the criteria.

If anything his being such just shows that we as humans are preC-programmed to think they're more attractive.

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No, I think you are pre-programmed to find certain cartoon characters attractive and are in complete denial about your own sexuality. I might not personally find Aladdin attractive, but I could certainly appreciate why a lot of girls (and boys) would. But an alpha? No, dude. If anything he's a twink. A straight twink, but a twink nonetheless.

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He's confident, social, viewed as a leader, takes risks, comfortable around the opposite sex, rejects failure and direct.

That's an alpha.

Contrast that with his beta counterpart Jafar.

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Now I know you're a troll.

Alphas don't exist. We've been over this twice. Maybe third time's a charm, dotard?

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You didn't reply to my comment. It's hard to make you angry if you don't argue. I came here for an argument!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kQFKtI6gn9Y

"If all mankind minus one, were of one opinion, and only one person were of the contrary opinion, mankind would be no more justified in silencing that one person, than he, if he had the power, would be justified in silencing mankind."
~John Stuart Mill~

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*grumbles about this post appearing in the wrong place*

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but there's nothing wrong with saying you should watch this movie or TV show because it appeals to you on a political level.

if it actually had a political message I'd agree. Dotard.

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Just so you know, The Grey was a pretty large contributor to conservative efforts to delist wolves as an endangered species in the United States (its message was effectively "Do you really want to protect these obviously dangerous monsters? What the fuck were those libtards thinking?"). I'm not exactly sure where and when money was passed around during the making of that movie but it has such an extremely reactionary message towards things like the Endangered Species Act to the point that I'm pretty sure major ranching and hunting special interest groups, and possibly the NRA, were behind the creation of that "movie."

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While I'm pointing out stupid movie comments are stupid, this is a stupid movie comment.

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This movie came out months after they were already delisted, and even that was after efforts to delist them because they weren't endangered anymore and were wiping out elk population were blocked in 2009.

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On one hand, I'll be kind of disappointed if this subthread never crosses over with the "alpha" subthread.

On the other, I'll be kind of disappointed if it does.

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It's bad enough you'd fuck human Ann Coulter. It's unfucking forgivable that you'd fuck cartoon pony Coulter. You are more Haram than a thousand Muslamic ray guns in the eyes of Allah himself infidel!

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You'd fuck The Prophet Muhammad

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Over Anne the Man? Hell yes!

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Can't really confirm or deny since we have even less idea of what he looked like than Jesus, and I'm not even sure Jesus would be my type.

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I'm torn on whether to see this in the theater. MLP FIM has gone downhill a bit recently from my view ever since Starlight Glimmer became a prominent character. To me, she was the worst of the reformed villains, and I think has easily the most boring background story. I havent really kept up with the last season because I got kind of annoyed about seeing Twilight teach her about friendship.

I think maybe I am also burned out on the show because there is no real character growth for any character other than Twilight. It sounds like the Movie continues with that trend, perhaps with the slight exception of Pinkie? But yea, all the others seem to stay pretty static throughout (yea the cutie mark crusaders eventually get their marks but I thought that was pretty anticlimactic really. They find out that they are just supposed to be the cutie mark crusaders forever!! Not really growth. Maybe you could say the reformed villains grow but their story arcs are kinda interchangeable to some degree.)

I might go see it in the theater just because I am curious about the new characters (those bird pirates seem to have pretty cool designs), but I might also just wait for streaming.

Your rating: None Average: 3.7 (3 votes)

Starlight is awesome. One of the best characters in the show, especially with Trixie.

"If all mankind minus one, were of one opinion, and only one person were of the contrary opinion, mankind would be no more justified in silencing that one person, than he, if he had the power, would be justified in silencing mankind."
~John Stuart Mill~

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ewwww.

now I like you even less.

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Hey don't insult my girl Starlight I have a personal connection to that character.

And as for your choice on how to view it, I recommend buying it on DVD when the time comes if you like it enough. This movie needs all the money it can get.

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Why? Is the $4+ billion multinational corporation Hasbro gonna go under unless super manly dudes line up to empty their wallets for it?

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It's called box office revenue. If this film does well they may make another one.

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DVD sales have no effect on box office revenue. That's why it's called box office revenue. Either way, why don't you let the Invisible Hand deal with it instead of entreating people who haven't seen it to give it their money. Aren't you a conservative anymore?

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Nice twisting of my words there, Storm King. First off, DVD sales might not have any effect on box office but they still provide an incentive to make another movie. Hence why I brought up box office when you asked why Hasbro should care about money made off the movie.

Second off, it's actually pretty conservative of me to recommend that if people want to buy/see one movie for the year, it should be the best conservative film of said year.

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I'm pretty certain I will not be purchasing this movie.

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It's not twisting your words, you're just using words incorrectly.

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I kind of lost interest after season 4, nothing to say that it's probably still not a good show, but I just lost interest because I think I saw all it could do. The overall characterization has just gotten weaker over time.

Your rating: None Average: 3.3 (3 votes)

There are some standout episodes in the last three seasons, but getting fewer and farther between. It really wouldn't surprise me if season 8 is the last. They only have one loose end to deal with. Maybe we'll get some Sea Ponies or Breezies back for a return appearance, but after that they could easily exit stage left. It's gone on far longer than I think Hasbro ever planned for, but you can only milk it so long before even it's target audience gets bored. Actually most of those in the target audience when it started probably outgrew it and stopped watching it years ago. The problem is that I think a lot of the older fans are starting to as well.

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How do you figure that? This last season has had some of the best episodes in the show and probably more excellent episodes than others. If I quickly count ones that I think are really good or excellent.

S7: 10
S6: 7
S5: 8
S4: 4
S3: 3
S2: 8
S1: 5

This is just a quick look through the episode titles but the later seasons have more of the really good episodes, with a surprisingly large number in S2.

"If all mankind minus one, were of one opinion, and only one person were of the contrary opinion, mankind would be no more justified in silencing that one person, than he, if he had the power, would be justified in silencing mankind."
~John Stuart Mill~

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You liked the Mysterious Mare Do Well? Interesting.

Oh, and BTW, Black Pigeon Speaks made a response to that article you sent me on the Charlottesville thread: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gmt5pfOiyC0

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Can we go one article without going back to that non-sequester crap.

(I mean, my god, this is me speaking here XD)

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I really wonder if people just sit around all day listening to these far right youtubers. How much time is wasted out of each day doing that? Seriously, these guys' rants tend to be movie length.

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I really wonder if people just sit around all day watching Rachel Maddow or Anderson Cooper. I mean, some of their rants tend to be movie length.

TFW you come to start a fight and get your ass kicked so hard you decide to file a lawsuit: http://www.cnn.com/2017/10/12/politics/charlottesville-lawsuit/index.html

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Well if the dip was around season 4 that may be why I stopped watching, If there's a dip some may not survive past the trough.

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Funny. I joined a reactor's Discord channel recently and yesterday this same theme of conversation came up but with very different conclusion. There the consensus was that the success of MLP was due to strong characterisation and that the writers aren't afraid to change things.

It was said that in weaker shows the CMC would never get cutie marks, Rainbow would've never got into the Wonderbolts and so on but MLP was willing to develop the characters. I think character development is still going strong, particularly with Starlight but also with all the others. The characters are just not as one dimensional as before and we often see a lot of emotional depth, for example with Pinkie's key episode or from Rainbow when Tank is going to hibernate.

The other thing that seems relevant here is that the reactor himself said he sees MLP being divided into 2 different arcs. The first arc is about Twilight Sparkle and covers seasons 1 to 4. Season 5 onwards is the second arc which is now revolving more around Starlight and Twilgiht's move to a mentor position. Interestingly enough you lose interest exactly where he says the show switches arcs.

"If all mankind minus one, were of one opinion, and only one person were of the contrary opinion, mankind would be no more justified in silencing that one person, than he, if he had the power, would be justified in silencing mankind."
~John Stuart Mill~

Your rating: None Average: 2.5 (4 votes)

Like I said, Starlight is just a bad character. It was good you brought up Trixie because Starlight is basically just Trixie but halfway nice. Her transition to being "good" doesn't really seem that sincere most of the time, and she often seems to still do evil-ish stuff (like mind controlling everyone to accomplish a task) and then afterwards everyone just blows it off like "ohh, that scamp Starlight!!"

Also, I think the idea of teaching a villain to be a friend as if it were a class in school is pretty silly. Discord's transition was much better handled since he is learning on his own, and his inconsistencies make sense because he is chaos incarnate.

Yea, they gave the CMC their marks finally, but as I said that didn't really change anything. They are still essentially doing the same schtick. The funny thing about the CMC is that I thought the episode with Gabby the gryphon was the best episode with them as the focus, but simply because Gabby was such a superior character to them, EVEN with her being a Mary Sue. That's saying something. Gabby actually had a complete and compelling story arc, all in one episode, and manages to grow as a character somehow notwithstanding her perfection. At the same time, the CMC were kind of useless bystanders and it showed how little the show has actually developed them.

I could go in depth on each character and how they haven't been developed. Spike is another glaring example. They throw a dragon episode in a few times but again, his role, abilities and relationships don't actually change. He's the token male character who is comic relief, and not really capable of inspiring any romantic rivalries. That was his purpose at the beginning and that is what he will remain until the very end.

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As an older fan (i've been watching since G1), i'd say go see it. It's worth it.

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So, I'm glad you reviewed this movie. It felt more honest than some of the "professional" ones that seem to just hate for the sake of it.

I mean, seriously, "worse than the Emoji Movie?"

I am not one to bash opinions, most of the time anyways, and I had problems with the film too, but can these people who say that explain to me with a straight face how this movie is worse than the one that had a literal walking-talking piece of dung?

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Yeah, I saw that one, and that guy needs to take a chill pill.

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You had me at "Taye Diggs". <3

I'd be curious to see him as a talking cat - or...any other way he's presented on film or TV. Naked or not. *^^*

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oh my goodness yes...

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He follows me on Twitter.
I try very hard not to squee. *^^*

Your rating: None Average: 4.5 (2 votes)

My complaints with this movie basically echo others - this felt like a very long episode more then a particularly epic movie. I'll excuse that Twilight should be able to handle things pretty easily by now since this should in theory also work as a standalone movie for people who aren't familiar with the show (say, non-brony parents taking their kids).

Also same with the theater - me and my friend had the whole theater to ourselves when we went about a week ago.

that said... I need Capper in the main show. He's so charming and... just. Please.I love him. Make Capper a recurring character. Also by extension please fully cement straight-up anthro animals as canon in the show.

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2cross2affliction (Brendan Kachel)read storiescontact (login required)

a red fox

New teeth. That's weird.