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satire

Review: 'Play Little Victims', by Kenneth Cook

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Play Little Victims This short but deadly satire is set in the U.S., but has never been published there. Does it cut too close to home?

In 2000 (this was written in 1978), God decides to wipe out all life on Earth by covering everything instantly with giant glaciers. (Actually, He intended to wipe out all life in 1000 A.D., but He forgot.) He misses one two-square-mile valley in the center of North America, inhabited by two field mice, Adamus and Evemus. Because God also scraps the laws of evolution, the mice immediately develop intelligence. Not knowing that God missed them by accident, they decide that they are God’s new chosen people; and since the small valley has a town with a radio and TV station, an automobile factory, and lots of back issues of newspapers, they assume that He wants them to model themselves upon humans.

In no time at all, because mice breed fast, there are enough of them for Adamus to appoint a Board to help him guide the common mice.

‘I mean,’ continued Adamus, ‘it is obvious to all that this wonderful world in which we live did not just happen by accident. There has to be a Divine Plan and we are part of that Plan. We have a destiny which we must fulfill.’
The mice all looked at each other and nodded wisely.
‘Well,’ said Adamus, ‘I have discovered what it’s all about. What happened was this: the source of all being is God, who made the Valley and everything else in the universe. To prepare the way for mousekind God sent a sort of vanguard of creatures He called Men, who might best be thought of as sort of supermice. These Men prepared the Valley for us and left us all these marvelous technological aids for our existence. They also left us a vast body of literature for our guidance. Our destiny in life is to fulfill the plan of God by making the Valley an extension of Heaven. To guide us in this task we have the Word of Man, so we just can’t go wrong.’ (p. 12)

Needless to say, the mice go wrong with almost every decision that Adamus makes. One mouse on the Board, Logimus, thinks for himself and has doubts about Adamus’ pronouncements about what God wants. But Adamus, backed by his Board of yes-mice, steamrollers right over him.

Rushcutters Bay, NSW, Australia, Pergamon Press, June 1978, vi + 87 pages, 0-08-023123-3, $A9.00. Illustrated by Megan Gressor.

Retrospective: 'The Bear That Wasn't', by Frank Tashlin

Your rating: None Average: 4.3 (3 votes)

The Bear That WasntJerry Beck at Cartoon Scoop has posted on Frank Tashlin’s 1946 children's book The Bear That Wasn’t. In case you are unfamiliar with the famous story, a bear in a forest goes into a cave to hibernate for the winter. He emerges next spring to find that a human factory has been built around him. When a foreman orders him to get to work, and he protests that he is a bear, not a man, everyone tells him, “Don’t be silly! Bears are in the zoo, not in a factory! You are just a silly man in a fur coat who needs a shave!” So he becomes a factory worker, until the next winter when he has to hibernate again.

The moral was not new. It was one of President Abraham Lincoln’s favorite jokes.

“If you call a tail a leg, how many legs does a dog have?”
“Four, because calling a tail a leg don’t make it one.”

Parody trailer: 'Pac-Man the Movie'

Your rating: None Average: 3.6 (9 votes)

The Cartoon Brew website posted this 6’07” phony trailer for a Pac-Man movie back in April, made by Tulsa studio Steelehouse Productions. Live-action humans; anthropomorphic video-game characters. (See also: "Behind the scenes" footage)

Hey, Crossaffliction, is Steelehouse in your neighborhood?

Video: Vote for Mulvar!

Your rating: None Average: 4.5 (2 votes)

Whatever you’re for, Mulvar is for it, too. And he’s anthropomorphic, also. The Cartoon Brew website brings us this ultimate candidate, created by Montreal animator Patrick Désilets for this 2012 election year. (Note: Loud audio.)

'Filthy Beast', a hamster catastrophe

Your rating: None Average: 3 (3 votes)

I went looking on the “BD Selection” website to see if a new Blacksad album is out in France. No; but this sounds interesting. Here is my translation of the French summary/review of Sale Bête, T. 1: Hamster drame (Filthy Beast, vol. 1: the hamster catastrophe) by “Boris”.

Adult Swim's 'Check It Out' to profile furries on Sunday night

Your rating: None Average: 4 (2 votes)

U.S. cable channel Adult Swim is showing an episode of Check It Out! about furries, entitled 'Animals', to be broadcast Sunday 11:30PM CST (10:30PM MST, 12:30AM Monday EST/PST).

Update (18 Apr): The full segment is now available, but has no more furry-specific content.

Interviewer 'Dr. Steve Brule' leads with such incisive questions as "How come you wanna be an animal?", "What kind of animal do you want to be?" and "How do you catch an animal?" Excited by the concept, he suggests "[turning] into some animals and see what'd happen!"

Brule (dressed in a donkey suit) was not impressed by the resulting mini-fursuit-parade, calling it "not that fun", but "what else are you gonna do, dressed up like a dang animal?"

The furs, Amy and Crash the Dog, were recruited after the producers had difficulty finding participants. [Higgs Raccoon]

Review: 'The Unscratchables', by Cornelius Kane

Your rating: None Average: 3 (1 vote)

This gritty crime novel is a parody with anthropomorphic dog and cat detectives. Oh, gee, we haven’t seen THAT before!

San Bernardo is their territory, a seething metropolis where fat-cats prance in the exclusive island enclave of Kathattan while working dogs wallow in the stinking squalor of the Kennels. (back-cover blurb)

NYC, Simon & Schuster/Scribner, July 2009, trade paperback $14.00 (259 pages), Kindle $10.99.

ONN's Today Now! gives cat relationship tips

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Onion News Network breakfast show Today Now! gives advice from author Melissa Donnelly on sparking up the relationship with your cat.

Hint: Watch for additional tips from her book displayed in the footer.

Commie Kittens!

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Granted, it's not badgers.

But still... God help us.

This selection is from the same people who brought us "Viking Kittens" and at least a dozen other singing animal animations, both original and from popular music.

Trickster

Christ Can Help Furverts!

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Purging Inhuman Sexual Orientation with Christ, (PISOC), claims to be
a Christian organization whose aim is to help furries to escape, much
as if Fur Fandom were a mind-bending cult. I'm not sure whether they
seriously mean it, but I can't imagine anybody on the right side of a
lunatic assylum's door taking them seriously!

Check them for yourself.


Especially note their "10 quick facts" about Furry.

For instance, did you know that you've been castrated? Are you
snickering yet?

D'Otter

So You Want To Be a Real-Life Furry

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It's @ Fur Thing, a non-profit pending registration, has started up a webpage featuring a fund that will go towards forming a think-tank and a research council that hopes to develop procedures and technology that will someday produce real-life furries. The homepage of the fund is http://www.clasheerian.com/furthing/.

HILARIOUS parody with anthro flavor

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theonion.com, a popular news parody site, has posted a very funny story about "sexism among animals in nature." There is heavy anthropomorphication (if that's a word) of natural animal behavior on the part of some "scientists" conducting thier "research."

Not strictly furry, but VERY funny and apropos for those interested in behavioral aspects of anthropomorphics.

Mr. Manatee Goes to Washington

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Despite the seriousness of the topic of protecting what little Florida wetland remains, I had to get several chuckles out of this spoof in The Onion:

Endangered Manatee Struggles to Make Self Understood to Congress

Note from Gene: I'm one of those people who normally find the Onion just a little too sophomoric to actually be funny, but I got a chuckle from this one, as well.